Finding my WHY

Finding my WHY?
I have been working in direct sales and watching the biggest looser and I found a common thread in them. I know it is hard to connect the dots but this is really something everyone needs to think about. Why is it that you want something? Do you have a clear why in your work and you fitness goals? If you don't have a clear concept of why you are doing something it makes it that much harder to get it done.

I have been searching for my in business and now in fitness and I have come to the conclusion that I have been frustrated because I have been confusing some concepts. I thought my "why" and my end goal were the same thing. For example I thought the amount of money I wanted to make was going to motivate me to sell more products. I thought fitting into the tiny dress I have been dying to wear again was my fitness why. None of this was truly the case once I started to examine things and listen to my emotions.

My business why's have all changed and they actually only have a little to do with money. My fitness has long been a passion for me and I am working hard to get there because I love myself when I am fit! That is an amazing reason to do this.

I am completing an exercise in a book right now by defining my why here on my blog so I can refer back to it. So here goes.....
I want to sell enough products with my side business to pay for the education and equipment I will need to become a personal trainer and group fitness instructor. That is pretty much the main reason for the side business and I am going to keep working at it but I am not going to alienate friends and family to make it happen or spend half my week busting my but for one party booking and being frustrated.

With that said I used to spend a good 30-50 hours a week participating in exhausting activities and shelling out more than half of what I earned to keep promoting my business and all it did for me was make me feel exhausted and frustrated. Not going to happen any more because for once I know what I ultimately want to do and I am going to focus on that.

Here is where I struggle I have so many why's for wanting to be fit and half of them are very selfish! Well that is what I used to think. I love to help others and I like to make others happy especially my hubby and I have been living a lot of my life for others. Well I am done with that but first I want to say the pressure to please others was something I put on myself. I just assumed that my hubby was thinking this or that. I thought he would think I was stupid for wanting to be in the fitness industry....but once I asked him I was completely wrong. How many years have I wasted like this. I didn't believe I could dance but after sticking to it for months and month I am getting better.

Fitness why's may sometimes feel silly and selfish but here we go

I want to look good in that dress, in a bikini (even if I never wear one) and yes I want to look good naked even if the only people who ever see me that way are my hubby and whatever doctor I may have to see.

I want to look in the mirror and feel like every day I have accomplished something by keeping my body in great shape.

I want to get strong so I can do every Pole Dance move known and then some

I want to continue to get fit so I can teach others how to get fit and help them on a path to a new life

I want to stay fit so I have confidence.. For this one I used to think being thin was the reason I felt confident  and yes that helps a lot but the real source of this confidence is that I put in the work and achieved a goal.

I want to feel good about myself all the time so I want to keep pushing to the next level and the next and never give up.

I want to feel good physically not just look good but feel good. I want to have the energy to make it through each day. I want to be healthy yes but that is too broad I mean it when I say I want to feel good.

Here is one that I am embarrassed to say but it is true and I think about it from time to time. I want my hubby to notice other people looking at him like he is a lucky man when we go out together. I want to be the girl that draws a little extra attention.

So those are a few of my fitness why's

Now I have to set some goals the first of which I have already started. Getting fit is a lofty goal so I have to break it down into smaller pieces. So here goes.....

Goal 1
I want to see my abs by June. I know I have them I can feel the muscle but I still have enough fat around the midsection that I can not see them. So the fat must go!

How am I going to do that? 
I am going to start with going back to calorie counting and see what I am eating and what I need to cut. I don't like to do this because I tend to get obsessive and spend a lot of time on it or refuse to go out with my hubby and relax but it needs to be done for at least a few weeks just to calculate the amount of calories I am eating and get on top of any new foods that I don't really know the calorie amount.

I am going to log my exercise and work to get an average of at least 2 hours a day in activity. Don't worry yourselves I am not talking about strenuous exercise for 2 hours every day. I am just talking about a good strenuous work out about 5-6 days a week for 45-90 minutes and some more leisure or fun but consistent activities such as walking the dog or going out dancing.

Next I am going to be more active in every day activities like when I am reading I can stand up, when I play a game on the tablet to pass a little time before I need to be somewhere I can pace. I can do my least favorite thing in the world and clean my house more often. I can practice dance moves while cleaning and while getting ready. I can do those figure 8's (hips move in the shape of an 8) while I am blow drying my hair.  I think you get the picture.

My worst enemy is the television these days I love my TV so one of my first financial goals is to save up for that treadmill I really want so I can watch television while working out even if it is just a light walk. I can spend several hours each day watching television because I have so many things I enjoy watching and it just sucks my time away. I watch it all on Hulu so it is not like I have to watch at a particular time but I always watch in the am while I wake up. When I get the treadmill I will get up and set the treadmill up and do my usual feed all the animals and myself and get on the treadmill for a light morning walk while I watch last nights episode of Nashville. If I feel up to I could make it a jog or a run as I wake up. My bet is this will make my wake up time shorter most days too. I just need to get myself on a budget and work towards buying this treadmill.

Here is the really important one I will chart my progress and evaluate my diet and exercise program every two weeks. If I am not getting the results I need to get where I want to be I will tweak it a little but I will be able to wear that dress and look great in it by June! I can't measure in pounds right now. While some more pounds may come off I am not going to frustrate myself I am down to 127 but I know to get to the size I want I may not loos too many more pounds overall because I will be gaining muscle as I loose the fat. I would be happy when it is all said and done to see 120 on the scale but I will be happy with any weight that has me looking lean and strong. I want people to look at me and know that I work out I don't just want to be skinny.

How I lost 5 sizes!

Okay so I am not rocking the weight loss as much as the inches lost. I am now in a size 3 or less. I am actually over 10 pounds heavier than I was the last time I was this size so I know that I have a lot more muscle.The above video is what I am striving for...not the way the ladies look although that would be a plus I want to be able to do all of these moves. I am working hard to get there and I am rocking many of the strength moves but the graceful pretty moves need a lot of work.

I have my story posted at my new website but I plan to talk about it here too but in the mean time check out Pole Dance Fitness and let me know what you think. I am going to try to sell pole dance products there as well as helpful advice on getting fit and eating healthy. 

I have a lot of great news these days and plan to start sharing it here on my personal blog. Lately I have been working so many avenues to get fit and earn income that I have just about burned myself out. I started working with Wealthy Affiliates and I am learning how to stream my online efforts to produce some results. Just learning has helped me stop some of the worrying but I am still working on getting things organized and figuring  out where to focus my time and effort. 

So I plan to work on two income earning websites until I learn how to make them work right and take some time for me and post here on this blog to share what I am doing in all aspects of life. So starting tomorrow I am going to be scheduling my day around completing training and tasks. I will be updating this site and getting rid of old links and widgets. Let me know what you would like to see more. 

The new plans for this blog are to post about my personal thoughts about well everything with a focus on health, fitness and working online. Sorry for the time since the last post but I have been working on way too many things including pole dancing. 

8 Pounds Lost

Okay I have been loosing a good 2 pounds a week for a month now. I love the Herbalife shakes and  I have tons of energy.  I have picked up weight lifting again. I joined a gym so I could have access to weight machines at least until I get stronger. It is a lot harder to hurt yourself on the machines. I have been working out 5-6 days a week and I dug out my heart rate monitor so I can keep my heart rate up during cardio.

I would like things to happen faster but when I measured my inches last week I was down quite a bit more than I expected and most of my clothes I have been wearing are too big. I don't have much to wear which would normally be a good thing but I have a lot of places to go that I need to wear clothes. There are weddings and family gatherings and picnics and church and the gym. So I may have to go and grab a few dresses or something on clearance and I am sure I will have to grab some gym clothes. I have at least 2 more sizes to go before I fit in my old gym clothes.

So I have decided that I am going to sell Avon in addition to the Herbalife products I already sell. I am doing that because I already have a few customers and I think I can pick up more if I have some books when it is time to go to the events I have planned. I will only change my mind if I get the call and the cost to join has gone up or there are too many things to do to get involved.

If you are interested in my products or selling them let me know. You can email me at sundcarrie@yahoo.com or you can visit my Herbalife Website. I don't know what I will need for an Avon website yet but it might be something I choose to get.

Down 6.5 pounds and 12 inches!!!

Results!
I have to admit I was very discouraged this week because the scale just wouldn't budge. I was at 144.5 for five days. Then this morning it went down. I added some serous weight lifting this week and somehow I hoped it would make the numbers on the scale go down. I knew from a logical standpoint that I should be taking measurements instead but it is a lot harder than just getting out of bed and stepping on the scale.

So this morning I took my third set of measurements, biceps, hips, bust, waist, calves and thighs and I am down 6.5 more inches for a total of 12 since I started this program on June 22. I really am going to have to focus on the inches more now that I have a good strength training regimen going.

Gym
On Monday of this week I joined a gym that is less than 5 minutes from my house. The gym requires no contracts and it was only 100 dollars down and 10 dollars a month. Yea for me I now have somewhere to lift weights. I found that I also like the cardio bike, something I used to hate. It loosens up the hip I broke and helps with more fluid motions in the leg.

I have been sore for days but it is the good kind of sore and I know if I keep it up I can look like Jillian Michaels in no time. Yes that is my goal these days to have a body like hers and while I have a weight guideline it is not set in stone because I want to have some serious muscle tone.

My membership included 2 personal training sessions and the first one was just paper work and goal setting. I don't have the cash for more sessions but he did show me some great exercises and my sister in law also helped me learn to use the machines and showed me some great core exercises. I am all set to succeed for now as long as I keep it up.

Setbacks
Everyone has setbacks and mine seem to have to do with scheduling. I have not really messed my eating up because I have kept all the really bad food out of the house. I have however had a few days where poor planning has had me to the point of my stomach grumbling and me reaching for anything and everything to eat. If I had junk food in the house I would be in big trouble on those days.

I think the worst thing is finding time for exercise 6 days a week. I want to stay on a 6 day plan for the rest of my life but there is always something to do or some family function or a wedding or ....well you get my point, and that leads me to my next section about working in the fitness industry.

My New Job Is Getting Fit
I started my first (free) course to become a personal trainer. I have been reading the book when I have the time but some of it is overwhelming. I did graduate from college with a great GPA but I didn't learn a whole lot of science and the book is loaded with it. So I borrowed some textbooks from my sister to help me get a better grasp of some of the terms.

It won't be a breeze but it is not super difficult either and it gives me some time to prove to myself and my hubby  and potential clients that I can get in great shape. Then when I am close to my own goals I can start to take the ISSA course that seems to be accepted everywhere.

I want to stay in great shape and I want to help other people stay in shape and what better way to achieve this goal than to have a career in fitness.

Diet
Just an added note I am on a diet of sorts. I am using (and selling) Herbalife products. I love them because they give me energy and they are great for a quick meal when I am on the go. I can take a protein bar to the gym and eat it before a great work out and come home and have a shake. I am on a 2 shake a day program but I have been known to have another on for a snack especially now that I am lifting weights and need a protein boost without having to cook something. I eat a lot of veggies, salads and nuts for snacks and I eat a good meal but I am NOT counting calories. I get way too obsessive when I do that. I am also not cutting out red meat or potatoes but I am staying away from bread for right now. I eat ground buffalo and lean steaks but not everyday and I sometimes have potatoes cut up and grilled. I am staying away from the bread because I think I am addicted to it when I eat a little I just want more and more.

We went to the Outback the other day and I had a small steak with veggies and a sweet potato and one little piece of bread and once I took a bite it took everything in me to leave the rest there I don't even have that much of an issue with sweet things. I always thought my vice was sweets but come to find out it is bread. Not sure what that is all about but maybe I will learn in my personal training courses.

Good luck with your weight loss programs and thanks to all of you who have supported me over the years. This time I am going to get it done and by the end of October you will get the before and after pics.

My Crazy Life

This is just going to be a bit of rambling because I have had an almost unbearable week. I have had some victories but it is hard to focus on them with everything that has happened to me. The first big thing has something to do with the Herbalife business that I am starting. I want to say that it is not Herbalife that I have a problem with it is the people/company I came in with. Then there is the duplex that was broken into and all the copper pipes stolen plus a broken window.

Now in the midst of this stuff I started my new diet plan. I am on the Herbalife quick start plan and I love it. The shakes are amazing and I eat 4-5 times a day just replace two meals with shakes. I am still working that out because I need to get some protein in with my snacks. I have been having a lot of salads and sometimes I save the last snack for the evening and have home made ice cream but I have been eating just a very small portion of it. I need to figure out the calories in each batch but I am still better off than much of the grocery store ice cream. It has a lot less sugar in it and none of the extra stuff you can't pronounce.

I started at 150 on Sunday and have worked out everyday since (5 days) and I am now at 148 so that is not too shabby for less than a week. I have to work out the diet plan a bit but the work outs I am feeling good about. I have been pushing myself and on the days I feel like I can't do it I just keep doing it even if it isn't as fast as yesterday.

I started off really motivated but right today I am feeling like giving up because I am so irritated with life. I am not going to give up! I just can't!

 So you want to know what else happened well I went to incomeathome.com and signed up for an online business. They were very secretive about their product and their methods. They are a group of people selling Herbalife products in a different way and it is a very high pressure and deceptive way. I am not going to go into details because I already feel like a huge idiot for letting them dupe me out of money and tons of time before I could even start selling the product. If I had not stood my ground it could have been worse. I have been fighting to get some of my money back and it is not working. I have almost 600 dollars into it and I have one quick start package which would have cost me 110 dollars had I signed up locally. That doesn't count the phone minutes and the 20-30 hours of my time on phone calls and training that did not teach me much about the products.

So I canceled everything I could and filed the BBB reports that I could and I called Herbalife and asked if I could just be a regular distributor. I found a nutrition club with the help of some great friends and I was very impressed with the way they do business. It was not high pressure and they were very transparent about the costs. I was able to taste some very good shake recipes and I am excited to sell the products. I just can't get the bad taste out of my mouth with the experience I have been having. I have been fighting for hours each day with the many different companies that I have signed up for because the training said I HAD to have this and that and NONE of it is required to sell the product.

The good this week is that the products I got from Herbalife are working very well for me I am so excited. I have a lot more physical energy already. I didn't get my product until Tuesday but I had some samples that I used to try to get through the earlier days. I love the shakes they are delicious and I was really scared they would not be. I would like to loose two pounds a week but I have to overcome my temptation to eat when I get stressed out or to just sit and pout about the money I couldn't afford to loose.

I just need to find the fighter in me and push through all of this and just get it done.

Herbalife for Weightloss

Trial Period Starting Soon

My starter package from Herbalife is in the mail and I am hoping it will get here today. I would like to start the program tomorrow. The program doesn't seem that hard as far as I can tell there are many options for the shakes and the snacks. I will be getting a lot of veggies from the farm I am working on and I can use them as snacks.

To be more clear on the weight loss program you are encouraged to take their herbal tablets 3 times a day, and replace two meals a day with shakes. You are also encouraged to have two healthy snacks. I am pretty sure organic fresh picked veggies will be included in that.

The great thing is that according to the label on the website I can use these shakes because they don't have artificial sweeteners in them. I have never been able to do a program like this because the shakes gave me migraines. The best thing is that once I reach my goal weight I can go to one shake a day and continue with the supplements. I have not tried them yet but I may have to get creative on my farm days. I get really hungry when I do physical labor so I am thinking those days might be one shake days at first but I will play it by ear and pack a healthy lunch. If I am famished when I get home then I will have a healthy dinner as well if not I will have a shake.

Soon to be Herbalife Distributor 
I am really motivated to try this program because if I get good results I will be able to share my story with potential clients. So I am going to document my progress here on this blog. I am very excited to try the products and to sell them. They have a line of all natural skin care products I would love to try as well. I am working through my training right now and I hope to be able to share a website with you soon. I will keep you updated and if your are interested in products let me know.

Exhausted but Feeling Better

Farming Fun

Yesterday I spent my usual five hours at the farm. It flew by as I met new people and got to know a little about each of there lives. I dug holes for herbs in two long beds and now my hole digging arm is killing me. I have a raw spot on my thumb but no blisters this time. City life has done little to prepare me for the life of a farmer.

I also found a tick on me at the cook out at my moms house. I freaked out a little bit when I saw it and and threw it but that is the first tick I have ever seen. I was not so crazy when I went looking for it. Somehow it got on my hubby's knee when he bent down to look for it. So now I know that I need to have my hubby check me in the spots that I can't see for ticks each time I come home.

Loosing Weight
All this work has left me with little time to worry about what to snack on next or working out. That combination has brought me to a place where I have lost about five pounds in about 3 weeks. So I am pretty happy about the results. I am thinking the first side effect of farming is sore muscles and the second is weight loss. It doesn't seem to be a quick weight lose program but it seems to be rather effective. Not only am I loosing weight but I feel stronger and I can do more each time I go.

While I am tired today I feel much better than I have the last 11 days and that really helps me to see all the good in my life. I love my life right now and I am happy to be alive.

Maybe Life Shouldn’t Be Easy

Today I was sitting here typing some blog posts and thinking about how sore I was after two days of heavy duty cleaning. I worked on a basement that had not been cleaned in many years and a garage that was in disarray when we moved in. Of course we added to the mess that was already in the garage and basement but never made a move to make things better.

We are always looking to make our life easier from kitchen gadgets that promise to make you preparation time a breeze to garden gadgets that turn the soil when you are sleeping. We don’t want to have to do the hard stuff. I have to wonder though if we all did the hard stuff would we have the weight problems we have today. If I spent hours each day cooking from scratch and cleaning and working in the garden would I need that cardio machine? If we get a farm and I have to get up and milk some goats and collect some eggs, clean out animal living quarters and feed them would I end up lose weight purely because I was physically active as a part of my regular day.

I think I would be a lot thinner if I were to do those things. I think our modern lifestyle of sitting on the couch or in a chair all day is why we must work so hard to lose weight. I am not saying that if you start a light cleaning routine that you reach your goal weight. What I am saying is that many people who don’t have physical jobs are like me. They are so out of shape and out of touch that when they take on a project that requires some moderate lifting, bending, squatting and standing they end up immobilized for a few days. I am saying if we kept it up and added to it we would end up thinner. We would build the muscles we needed to do some moderate physical labor without having to set aside extra time for a good workout. You won't make it to your high school weight or become a bodybuilder with this approach but if you have a couch potato gut you might just loose a good portion of it.

I have to admit I envy the people who get to spend their day working on their land to feed themselves and others. I wish I could have fresh veggies and raise the chickens and cows that I eat. I wish that had to work hard each day to grow and raise my own food. I have not done a survey nor do I have any scientific facts to back up my claims but I do believe if we stopped trying to find the quickest easiest method to accomplish our daily tasks our lives would benefit greatly. So what are you doing today to make your life harder?

Down 6 Pounds Now With Weight Watchers

I got on the scale this morning because I was disappointed on Monday when I had gained a half pound. I know that I lost 4.5 pounds the first week and only gained a half pound back but it still didn't feel great. I started two weeks ago Monday at 155 and now I am 149. I still have a long way to go but that was encouraging.

I feel much more human today but everything still tastes like crap. My coffee tastes good but not much else. The snot draining down my throat makes me not want to eat anyway. I just ate a lot of little stuff yesterday and will probably do the same for today.

I work from 3-5 today so I do plan to spend most of my day writing and reading about writing. If I feel up to it later I might to some of the light exercises in the Your Shape game. The Zen classes will be a good light activity.

Work, Work and More Work.

My week has been a little strange this week with all the extra shifts I picked up. I had trouble organizing my time around my shifts. I work at home so I should have done better. It was my first week without an overnight shift. My 12.5 hour shift is a day shift now. I liked it much better and I have been sleeping better.


This week went well except that I didn't organize my free time as well as I should have. I had plenty of time to work out and get blogs posted and clean but I just didn't.  On a typical day I only work 3-4 hours so if I were to organize my time I could get a lot more done. 


Lets move on from my first mistake this week to the second one. I did very well on my eating plan until yesterday. As I said I was home working a 12.5 hour shift and the phones were ringing a lot more than my overnight shift. I got hungry and I had nothing planned for dinner and not much healthy left for the week. My back up Smart Ones pizza was not going to be enough and I was all out of lunch meat and veggies to snack on. I was not prepared and I let myself get so hungry that I ate 5 pieces of the pizza I ordered. I ordered thing crust but I am kind of sure that was a mistake this time. I might have felt full faster if I had ordered regular crust. 


For God only knows what reason I still didn't feel full. I didn't eat anymore because I knew I was being ridiculous as it was. I finished a little over half a medium pizza and I am have no idea how many points that is but I am just going to say it is all my weekly points and maybe then some. I ordered pizza because it could all be done online between calls. I didn't have to put any calls on hold and my hubby would be up by the time the pizza guy came to the door. I should have ordered Chinese but every time I tried to do something for myself a call came in and I value my job over my growling stomach.


So now I know that I need to have something that is super easy for dinner on Saturdays. I was up at 6am and I am hungry for dinner much earlier than usual. So if need be I should run to the store midweek for some extra veggies to snack on (some of mine went bad by then) and something for dinner. I either need to find something healthy that can be thrown in the microwave or something I don't have to cook at all. 


Aside from the two big mistakes this week things were great. I earned extra money and before yesterday I was doing great on the diet. I have not weighed much this week so Monday will tell if I made a huge mess of things or not. I would be happy to have maintained my first weeks weight loss after what I did yesterday.

Weight Watchers Working With my Lifestyle

Well things are looking good here. I have been working this morning on a survey for a side project I am working on with my mentor and another nice woman.

I just thought I would stop in and post an update. I have been doing very well on my diet. I was really hungry and yesterday and I felt like I ate a ton but because I made good food choices I stayed with in my daily points.

I have picked up a quite a few extra day shifts now that my 12 hour shift is a day shift. I had a very stressful and busy day on Monday. We had an ice storm and many people with power out. I had a lot of calls from people needing somewhere to stay. It was one of those days that was super rewarding because I really did get to help people. I don't mind the stress when the results are great. I say this to say now that I am getting good sleep I like my job again. I am going to pick up more shifts and may not be able to update this site daily.

I am still trying to organize my time so that I get a work out in 3-5 days a week but I this is the area I have the most trouble with. I have been doing well planning my weekly meals and buying healthy snacks but now I really have to get on the ball and get the activity in. Once the weather breaks most days I go for an hour walk with the hubby and dog. There were a few nice days last week that I went out but after the ice storm I have not been outdoors much.

I think I am going to start looking at it as some activity is better than none. I might start with a 20-30 minute workout most days then work my way up to a longer workout. I am still loosing weight without a lot of working out and I am thinking once I get closer to healthy weight exercise won't be as hard on my knees and my bad hip. I weighed in on Mondays and was down 4.5 pounds and I am trying not to weigh everyday again. The first week it felt good to weight everyday because I was down a good .5 pound a day. I know from experience the first week sometimes two I loose a bunch and then I get discouraged the next weeks because I only loose maybe 1.5-2.5 pounds or sometimes less. So I am really trying not to get obsessed with the scale.

I do want to say when I first started the new program I thought they were just changing the plan to make people buy new stuff. I was mad that my old cookbooks were worthless and everything else I bought less that two years ago was worthless. I thought they did it to get more money and I am sure it helps with revenues. I also was not sure the plan would work for me because my success on it the last time was minimal.  I was wrong. On the old plan I could eat a lot of high sugar, low fat stuff and now they have a higher emphasis on the sugar or carbohydrates. So sugary and starchy things which I tend to gravitate towards are much higher in points.

It is working and I am very happy about it.

Applebees and Weight Watchers

Yesterday I am searching around  the Weight Watchers website and I see someone talking about Applebees. They said they have a complete list of nutritional information for all there food. So I go there and find a few meals with very low points value but what I really wanted was a steak. I found an entire steak meal for 10 points and one for 13 points. I decided it was time to break out the gift card we received for Christmas and head out to dinner.

The 13 point meal also had veggies, potatoes and a few shrimp. It was amazing and I didn't go over my daily points. Here is what I ate yesterday:
Breakfast
1 banana
1 cup 2% milk (in my coffee because I need calcium but don't love milk)

Lunch
2 oz. ham
2 pieces of Pepridge Farm very thing whole wheat bread
1/4 oz of Cheese
16  Ranch multigrain chips

Snacks
Yo Crunch parfait
Weight Watchers oatmeal raisin cookie

Dinner
7 oz steak with garlic sauce and shrimp
Steamed Potatoes
Steamed mixed veggies

At the end of the day I used 29 points. I went to the grocery store yesterday and got fat free milk and a ton of veggies and fruit and some Weight Watchers 1 point cheese slices. Lunch meat seems to be the way to go for lunch so I picked another lean meat so my points would remain low.

I want to stay in my daily points range as often as possible and stay away from using my weekly points. I have been working it so that I eat something like a yogurt for breakfast and then if I am still hungry I have some fruit. So if I eat my daily points and I am still hungry I know it is better for me to use my weekly points than to feel like giving up on my diet. If I am not hungry there really is no need to eat something else. Knowing that I have days when I am not really hungry and days when I am ravenous and want to devour all the contents of the refrigerator I realize it is better just to play it by ear.

I am loving this program though as long as I plan well I can have just about anything I want. I only cook dinner for my hubby because we live on different shifts. For him the meal I cook is lunch. I can plan meals for him if he wants something really bad and eat a Smart Ones pizza or something. I can also plan higher point dinners if I plan the rest of my day around low points. Tonight we are having omelets I will be having mine with 1 egg and 2 egg whites, mushrooms, onions, WW cheese, with a tsp of olive oil to cook it in. My hubby chose his own filling and he will use regular cheese and full eggs.

So things are looking good as long as I can stay organized and keep my meals planned. I am fed up with how overweight I am. Healthy weight range for me is 106-132 and I am in a hurry to get to the 132 mark as I know I will feel much better then. That is about 20 pounds away so I am hoping for a good 2 pounds a week of weight loss. That would be 10 weeks from now putting me at my first goal (Healthy Weight) by the end of April. My ultimate goal is to stay between 115-120 all the time this way I never go over my goal weight and if I do I know I have to get back on track.

The scale was not my enemy today.

I was down another half a pound making it 153.5 today. I don't want to make a habit of getting on the scale everyday but some days I just feel like I could be pleasantly surprised.

I am meeting a friend for lunch today so I have not had a lot of points because I am not sure what I can eat when I get there. I did however pop in the step video Kim Kardashian: Fit In Your Jeans by Friday: Butt Blasting Cardio Step and it made me realize how horribly out of shape I am. It looks easy and I am pretty sure to anyone who works out on a regular basis that it is. I did a little over half the video and I was dripping buckets of sweat and felt like I might pass out.

So I got about 30 minutes in and I am hoping to get a walk with the dog and hubby in this evening since the weather is starting to cooperate. I still can not believe that I am this out of shape maybe I will have to do the video again with out a step and just pretend it is there until I get all the moves down and can do them without passing out.

So after lunch with one friend I get to hang out with another friend and then I have to make it home in time to walk with my hubby. I have such a great day planned for today. Hope you all have a great days as well.

Off to bed

Well I am off to bed here in a minute hopefully going to bed by 11 I will be asleep before midnight and able to get up by 8. I need to get up early because I have lunch with one friend and then I am going to another friends house to hang out for a bit.

I had a great work out today and I really want to get one in before I go tomorrow. I did an hour on the elliptical and I really kept my heart rate up most of the time. Sadly I just barely made it through the hour without passing out and I only got 3.1 miles in. I have not been pushing myself hard enough. I need to work harder during my workouts.

My food plan was not derailed today. We had veggies to munch on at the meeting I had today and I have even been able to use up some of the not so good food in the house by planning it with my points. I want to get to the store either tomorrow or Saturday because I need much more fruit and veggies. I want them to snack on because most don't cost points. I know this means I will probably have to go to the store several times a week until late spring but I will just have to suck it up and do it.

I hope the scale gives me better news next time I weigh in but that remains to be seen.

Did great on the diet today

Well today is relative in this case by the time I finish this post is will be tomorrow. I plan to go to bed no later than 2am. I will have a busy day tomorrow so I don't know if I will get to post.

So I get 29 Weight Watchers points a day plus 49 extra points a week. I used 27 today and I am not hungry. I am sure that won't happen everyday but it was reasonably easy to track. I am sure as I loose weight that will change.

The thing that gets me is I went for a 45 minute walk with my hubby and the dog and spend 45 minutes on the  elliptical and I am not hungry. I am tired but not hungry. I have a mountain of laundry to fold and put away so that will take me some time. Other than that I don't know what I will do to stay awake for 2 more hours.

I have a meeting with my supervisor tomorrow and I work overnight so I am not sure if I will get a good work out in but I am going to try. I really need to get to working out more regularly. I seem to be stuck with the idea that if I can't do at least an hour at a time that it is not worth doing it at all. I don't know for sure where that came from but I think a the personal trainer I went to see said something like that.

So I am hoping to remember to weight in in the morning I just guessed for the start of my plan. I think it was last week or so when I weighed in at 152 one day but I have been really bad with my eating. So I guessed 155 and that is so heavy for me. I have 35 pounds to loose and I really need to tone up. I am really motivated today to take charge of this.

It felt good to fit into smaller clothes when I went shopping and I know it will feel really good for those same clothes to be a little big on me. I can work with clothes that are too big but I just have to buy new ones when they are too small.

Weight Watchers Online

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!

I get a lot of cards in the mail for joining Weight Watchers again for free. I don't like going to meetings as I am not one to make friends with strangers just because we share a weight loss goal. It isn't that I don't like to talk with people that share my goals it is that when you meet face to face with people like that they start to share other things. I don't share deep dark secrets here so why would I do it in a meeting.

Now if some of my friends wanted to go I might go with them because we could support each other. We could privatively discuss some of the major emotional issues that keep us from staying motivated. I share here many of the issues and setbacks that i have but  I am not an open book. I don't like to share issues that might bite me in the ass later.

So I decided to join online to kick-start my diet plan. I am not having any success staying on my low carb diet at all. So I know I had some success the last time I was on Weight Watchers and decided to give it a try again. They make it pretty easy to count the points with there online system so now I just have to do it everyday.

I am still not sure how to work my overnight shift. I can't go all night without eating but should I start counting any calories I eat after midnight as the next day? I usually am up on Tuesday-Wednesday about 20 hours and I have a hard time dividing my food on that day. Mainly because I am up again on Wednesday around 3pm to 2 or 3am. Sometimes I try just get a few hours sleep and then get up so I will be tired all day but be able to sleep around midnight or so. I really wish I could get used to this schedule. I sleep 5 or 6 hours one night and 10 the next to try to make up for it.

Anyway I am getting back on track with my eating. With this plan I can eat just about anything I want as long as I keep a balance. I still need to plan my food and maybe I will get better at it if I just keep plugging away at the different plans until I find something that works for me. I do like the results I get from not eating too many carbs so I will start to learn to plan meals that are low in carbs but I won't make myself crazy if I have a lazy night and end up having turkey dogs on whole wheat buns with some potatoes for a side. I just have to figure out how to balance it so I am not overeating any one food group.

No More Sweet Stuff in This House

Okay I was really bad last night I just couldn't stay away from the sweet cinnamon bread I made. No more sweet stuff in this house. I don't have a huge problem staying away from the salty stuff but the sweets are my downfall.

If it is not in the house I can't eat it. So we just won't be buying anymore sweet stuff. I have reasonably healthy sweet stuff like yogurt and oatmeal and that will have to do. I don't want to gain these pounds back.

I did stand for a good 3 hours yesterday while doing chores and computer stuff. I also did about 45 minutes of a good cardio workout on the Xbox. So that makes my activity level much higher. Right now I am standing at the kitchen counter typing. I am trying to get my body used to being more active and standing instead of sitting is just the first step.

I hate to admit it but most days I spend most of my waking hours sitting. I get up and watch something on netflix or get on the computer in my chair. Even if I work I sit at my desk and that has got to change. I can make simple changes and just stand while I work and while I do all the computer stuff I do.

So today is a new day and I am working again on being more active and eating healthy.
For breakfast I had:
Hazelnut Latte oatmeal
A lot of coffee
Milk with my coffee about half a cup

I have my meals loosely planned for the rest of today but I should be able to stay at 1200 calories today with no problem.

Down 4 Pounds Now!

Yeah I weighed again this morning. I don't want to get addicted to weighing but I am seeing results like crazy. I don't even know why for sure. I am trying to stay more active during the day so even if I don't get a work out I am burning more calories. Like right now I am standing up at my kitchen counter typing this post.

I am trying to stand more and move more even if that means just walking around the house more. I can't wait until the weather gets better because in the few days I have tried to stay busier I have also wanted to go for a nice walk with the dog. I don't want to go now because of the massive amount of snow we had dumped on us Tuesday and Wednesday. I also don't like to go if there is still a lot of snow or ice on the ground. I don't like the cold but what I hate is that I always seem to fall on the ice. The fall results in pain and a few days of rest so it really isn't worth it.

I sort of cheated yesterday on my diet but since I am counting calories now I didn't do that bad. I had around 1500 calories yesterday only because I made a quick bread and had 3 pieces at over 200 each. I didn't eat them all at once but I just couldn't stay away.

I did have a piece for breakfast today but I have not touched it since. I am sure I will be able to keep my calories pretty low today even with the bread I just have to plan low calorie meals the rest of the day. I also plan to do a good 1/2 an hour or more of the boxing on my Xbox game tonight.

Wasted Day

So I went to bed at 7:30am after my long overnight shift. The offices were closed today because of the snow storm so I worked 4-7. That gave me plenty of time for adequate sleep. Except that my hubby (not his fault) got a crazy case of the hiccups and woke me up. After going back and forth upstairs and downstairs he finally took a blanked downstairs and tried to sleep.

That was not the worst of it all the kids had school off too. I slept okay with snow shoveling and snowblowers it is kind of a constant noise. The kids that kept ringing the doorbell and knocking on the door were making me seriously angry. I know they just wanted to earn a few bucks but they would not stop. I didn't want to get up and put clothes on answer the door. My hubby was not dressed to answer the door either and the dog barked at them until they went away.

So I am living on like three good hours of sleep. I am trying to keep my calories between 1200-1400 a day and I don't think that will be difficult today because I will not really be awake that much. I usually don't weight daily but when I got up this morning afternoon I was hoping for some sort of good news. I lost another half a pound so I say that was great news. I am down 3.5 pounds now. That is pretty exciting.

I stood for five hours of my shift and I worked to stay busy before my shift last night. I know it isn't exercise but it is better than sitting and relaxing all the time. I am kind of lazy today but I plan to be up and about more tomorrow. I am on call tomorrow but only until 7pm so I should be able to get a good evening work out in.

Plans for the Day Ruined

Well I am going to go out there and kill the tree people...okay not literally. I was however wishing that the giant tree they cut down would fall on their equipment and they would give up. It probably would not have helped me though as they are still out there. I am sure since they are working for the city the would have cleaned up the mess and come back with new equipment.

They are noisy and they have me blocked in my driveway. They have about 5 houses on each side of their work blocked in with the trees pieces and their equipment. I was supposed to have a meeting with my supervisor today but I can't get out. I am hoping they will finish this week. If not I will have to part a vehicle further down the street so I can get to a rescheduled meeting next week. I really wish I would have thought of that last night then I would not have had to call and cancel this morning. At least I will be prepared next time even if I have to walk a block to get to my car.

On that note I am thinking about what my plans for the new year will be. I am trying to get a better handle on how to organize my life. I am going to think of different areas of my life and set goals accordingly. I am going to strive for a healthier life in all aspects not just diet and exercise. I want to be good at everything I do and I want to decide what to focus on. I tend to have too many things going at once and never devote enough time to any one thing to be good at it.


I also have a lot of hobbies and I think I am going to have to spend less time watching television and movies and more time on reading and sewing. Reading because my popular blog is all about the books I read, well that and the anime posts are popular. I love to read a good book, in fact I just finished a fantastic one this morning.

I have decided to start sewing again because I like the things that I make much better than the things I find in the stores. Now that I sew I also find that I see things in the stores and say that would be cute if.......and picture how I could make it better. I like to sew I quit because I was frustrated with my machine and if I am totally honest because I was also frustrated with my weight. I will probably wait until spring to start sewing any clothes again. Most of my patterns are for warmer weather and I have a lot of light weight cotton material that I can use in my sewing machine. It won't take the heavier stuff the presser-foot doesn't work right it clamps down too tight. I might save for a new machine but if I do that I want something much fancier than what I have. Mine does the job and does it well when I use the right fabric.

So I need to loose some weight before I start sewing again and I am determined to do it. Well I need to loose sizes I am not going to get all obsessed over weight because I know the best way for me to slim down is to start building some muscle and add some cardio. I am not going get all crazy and try to loose 40 pounds in three months but I would like to be down a few sizes by spring. Making strict goals in this area is bad for me. It makes me feel like a failure when I am not on target and I usually give up completely . So I am saying that I need to measure myself when I get a chance work from those measurements with a goal of change (smaller numbers) every two weeks or so.

After the New Year I need to cut out junk food. I am not going on a diet I hate diets but I am going to look for healthy snacks and cut out things like potato chips and candy. I am not even going to say I will cut out all sweets. I do like to snack on lightly sweetened dry cereal when I am working and can't get up to eat a real meal. I am just going to have to plan a little better for my meals.