Thursday, October 21, 2010
I was hoping to be down a few more sizes but it really is my fault that I am not. I have trouble saying no to sweets and pizza. I loose my motivation to work out to easily and I expect instant results.
I have kept away from the scale lately but I have been walking a good three miles or more almost everyday with the hubby and the dog. I have been trying to do some strength training too. I am so wimpy that I have to do it every other day and I can't do much yet. How one can walk miles a day but be sore for at least four days from 40 girl push ups is beyond me.
So my plans for Halloween are to just hand out candy in something warm and comfy. I can watch all the kids in there cute and creepy costumes. I can hope for next year to fit into one. Maybe if that happens I will throw a costume party!
Well off to work I go.
Sunday, October 17, 2010
I also didn't realize how hyper critical I would be of the work I write for others. I don't want others to look bad and I spend way too much time revising. The worst part is my first instincts are often better than my revisions. What starts as polishing up my work ends up with a piece that lacks in personality. Oh well I will learn how to balance the editing process.
I am really feeling like me today and it is nice. It may have taken all morning to get out of this funk and realize that I have been trying too hard to please others. Not that it is never important to please others but there is a point where you need to stand up for yourself.
I have started a diary to shape a character that I have had in my head for years on my Dark Novels blog.
I actually think this Lucy character will have to be split up into multiple characters because I have changed her so much over the years. I have only dared to write about her a few times but I dream about her as well as make up stories in my head about her when I am bored. I have always felt like an idiot about this and I have only shared it a few times and then put it back in the crazy idea box to hide from the world.
Even if I never become some great novelist I can use this to spark my creativity. When I make up stories and characters it forces me to think outside the box. It forces me out of my real life and the breaks the chains that bind me to boredom and practicality.