Strippers and Pole Dancing

Warning this post is very likely to offend some people so read at your own risk!

I have not posted here in some time and my entire world view has changed since then. So I am using this site to kind of document some of the changes how I see the world. So I thought I would start with one that is very relevant to me.

Pole Dancing VS Stripping is there a difference? 


Pole Dancing is what you make of it and it can be anything from acrobatic to ballerina style to hard hitting rock n roll style to super sexy or even down and dirty. So in my opinion the only difference is how you see your pole dancing.

So  pole dance can be fitness oriented and it can be beyond sexy just like a stripper. The main difference is that pole dance is a job for some people and a hobby for others.

Well and there is the thing about the clothes most hobby pole dancers wear at least enough to cover the bits that society says should be covered. Strippers remove those bits for others entertainment.

My Shift in Thinking

Okay so I have gone from being one of those pole dancers that felt like strippers were evil and wanting to distance myself from them entirely to having mad respect for them. I no longer have any desire to distance myself from strippers or the sexy side of pole. It has not been a quick and easy transition thought I have had to disregard a lot of societal and religious conditioning.

So I know I am going to lose friends and followers once I am public with this but my shift started when I started to question my "faith" or in other words my religion. I am not anti-religious but also I started to find that not only was it not a source of comfort for me it was a great source of conflict in my life. So I decided to stop letting religion define me and start thinking for myself and creating a life that I wanted to live regardless of the possibility of being branded a sinner.

I started looking at people as just that people and I found that through pole dance I met some of the most amazing and positive people who would mostly be branded as sinners by my religion. I can't reconcile that with what I know about them. So this is a super long story and I don't want to bore you with all the details in this post.

I started thinking about strippers and about the fact that they probably make more money than a lot of us. I started thinking that they are way braver than I am because I would be way too embarrassed to do what they do. I also started thinking why the hell are they branded as evil when there are plenty of men paying to see them. Why is it that women are always at fault. Which takes me back to how religion generally treats girls as the little temptresses that have to be basically responsible for not causing a man to sin....Okay still can't go there with out getting a little angry but wouldn't it be better to teach young men to respect woman.

I started to think that women should be able to wear whatever they want or take whatever job they want and not be persecuted. I don't have the confidence to be a stripper but I have begun to take it as a compliment when people call me a stripper instead of an insult. I mean it is hard enough to learn the crazy pole tricks we learn then to do it in front of people while taking you clothes off...That is some mad skill.

So I am done judging people by my X-religions standards! I believe that any judging should be reserved for those that truly deserve it like murderers and people who abuse children.

FitGirl Progress

Good afternoon everyone just thought I would post a quick update and just a little personal stuff.

FitGirl Blogs

First I have spent way too much time the last few weeks on computer work and can't wait to do some more pole work today! I am learning a lot though and have put together a community oriented page for FitGirl. Somewhere that I can write posts that are maybe a little more personal than my blog posts on the business page. It also gives me more control over what goes up when and what types of things I can put on the page. So I would love for you to check it out and give me some feedback!
FitGirl Community
FitGirl Business

Training....Training and...Forced Rest

Well I was training like a maniac because I would like to start performing and competing. I wanted to nail a few really big moves ASAP! Guess what while I have seen progress I need to pace myself, just like I tell clients. I was forced to rest by the fact that I was so sore I could barley lift my coffee mug with out feeling it.

I won't see progress if I injure myself so I have to follow my own advice and if I don't have the all illusive Iron X with a twisty grip by my first performance so be it. I know plenty of advanced moves that I can work into combos.

The plan is to work a little each time I hit the pole on the moves I want to learn. Work on building the additional strength, muscle memory, and flexibility needed to acquire the kick ass super advanced moves. I will spend most of my practice time working the things I already know making them all work together to make a beautiful performance.

A little diary style addition....
Since this is a more of a diary blog I have to spend a little time talking about life in general.

First things first I love and hate writing! I love to blog posts that I am interested in and personal diary posts but I hate that when I get motivated to write ideas come to me the minute I lay my head down on the pillow for the night!

Seriously I am going to have to get a notebook and put it next to the bed so maybe if I just jot down some of the ideas I will be able to fall asleep.

Then there is the writing process.....

I tend to write too much all the time so over the last few weeks I have learned to start with a topic and write, write and write. Then come back later and see if I need to do several posts or if I just need to narrow the one post down.

Now if I could just learn to shut off the ideas when I don't want them and turn them on when I sit down to write that would be great. Then it would be really awesome if my mind would not bombard me with 200 things I want to say about each topic and quickly organize it into a comprehensive post.

Well I guess you can't have everything right!

Pole Fitness is My Business

Hello there everyone! I have been super busy starting my own business and promoting it. I have had my ups and downs and gone through some spells where I was freaking out for one reason or another. I have started to get the hang of what is working for me and what just adds additional stress.

Because this is my personal blog I thought I would come here today and post an update on my life. In February 2014 I started preparation to open a new business. At the end of January I passed my personal trainer certification exam but I really wanted to teach pole. I tried my hand at teaching some cardio kick classes and found my passion really lies in pole fitness. So I decided to stop trying to do things I was not passionate about and focus on something I was.

I also really wanted to work from home or close to home because I am not much for a long commute especially the 4-6 months a year in Ohio that it can snow. My hubby and I own a duplex that we bought shortly after we were married. It worked well for us to rent half out for a long time then our awesome tenant had to move and we tired moving out and renting to two people then we realized good tenants are hard to find. So we moved back and were using our upstairs basically to store things. So the idea for me was to make it into my studio and offer private or semi private pole fitness sessions. Emphasis on the fitness aspect rather than the dance aspect.

Then as you can imagine loads of well meaning people had many ideas for how to promote my business and what I should do to make money. I was pulling myself in so many directions and trying to get any client in the door I couldn't answer simple questions about my services. I didn't want to say no to anything or anyone because it could be some extra money. Yea... that was not working for me so I narrowed it back down to pole fitness which can include strength and flexibility training.

I love what I do and people who talk to me know it and if it takes time to really grow the business that is okay. I just need to stay focused! I have a new website and am working on a blog for my business so if you have a little time please visit FitGirl and leave your thoughts.

Wish I would have known

Are there things you wish you could go back and tell yourself as a child. Over the last year and a half I have learned a few things that I wish I could go back and tell myself. As a child I was very shy and everything embarrassed me so I spent a lot of time avoiding embarrassment. Needless to say that let to trying a lot of things once or twice then feeling like it was not worth the embarrassment to keep trying and failing.

I spent a lot of time blaming my parents who didn't let me do a whole lot of anything. They were very strict but loving parents. Let me clarify what I mean by strict, they tried to shield me as much as possible from what they considered the bad stuff. Basically I was very limited in the types for movies and music I was exposed to and I was not allowed to do a lot of things other kids were. I was not abused although as a teen who couldn't go see the concerts she wanted to I felt abused.

Over the last year and a half I have found that I love dancing and I take Latin dance classes and pole dance and aerial fitness classes. I love them but I was really bad when I started. I kept thinking that had I done gymnastics when I was a child I would have loved it and my parents didn't encourage it. The more I think about it the more I realize even if they did encourage it I would have quit because it was hard. So had my parents decided to let me take dance lessons and I couldn't get it in a few lessons I would have quit.

I realize now that it had nothing to do with my parents while my options were limited as to what I could do they would have helped me find something had I just stuck with it. I even remember one year I joined the track team and they made me fill my commitment. I am was not a runner then and I am not a runner now but I stuck it out and regardless of winning anything it helped me slim down and develop new social contacts.

So what do I wish I could have told myself as a child and teen? I wish I could have told myself when I was really young and took a few tumbling classes that even though it is hard right now it will get easier. That just because I don't learn as fast as the other girls that does not mean I won't learn it. As a teen I wish I would have learned to dance even if the only classes I was able to attend were ballroom style dancing but again I would have quit because it was hard. I wish I could have told my teenage self that anything I wanted to do could be done with hard work and dedication.

It is a lesson I have learned over and over since I signed up for a pole dance fitness class and expanded my types of fitness. I try it all now and when I don't get it the first time or even the first 50 times I just keep saying to myself that if I keep practicing I will get it. It has taken me a long time but I am trying to eliminate I can't from my vocabulary. Well for the most part there are probably thing I literally can't do but when it comes to learning a new dance step or a complicated upside down move on the pole or in the fabrics I have changed my vocabulary. I am also trying to help other ladies do the same when I catch my self saying " I can't" I almost always remember to at YET to the end of that. It is such a habit I don't seem to be able to change the vocabulary completely yet but it will come.

I have been down on myself for most of my 3 and a half decades of life so it is going to take some time to develop a better more positive vocabulary. I always felt like I was doomed for failure in everything I did. I am still not an ace at the dancing part of anything but I am learning and I keep improving and that is good enough for me. I am not good at a lot of things but each time I pick something I really like and really want to get better at then work hard to learn it guess what I get better at it.

Detoxifying your life

Good morning everyone! I am going to be changing the direction of this blog....I know I have done this multiple times but this time I mean it. I am not promising anything on a regular basis because every time I do life just gets in the way and blogging moves just gets moved lower and lower on the priority list.

I am not sure I will actually go back and delete anything but I am going to focus heavily healthy living including but not limited to, product reviews, healthy eating tips, fitness tips and my personal journey to eliminate toxins in my diet and personal care.

I have been pretty passionate about this in the past but the products have just been so expensive so I gave up. You can't spend a third of your income on food and personal care items. Now I have been eating more organic produce and other products for while now but sometimes I just can't. Sometimes we buy from the health store just to support them or to find an item that is not sold anywhere else. Now that the grocery store is selling a lot more organic I purchase these items there as often as I can to let those chain stores know that organic is important to me. The great thing is they now offer a lot of sales at stores like Krogers on the organic items. Just this past week I got Stonyfield Farms Greek yogurt at the 10 for $10 price. I saved about $7 dollars by stocking up.

The personal care items we have in our homes such as toothpaste, soaps, shampoos, lotions, deodorant and makeup are all full of toxic chemicals. Now I am not going to say that any one of these chemicals will give you cancer or put you six feet under twenty years early. I know that is not the case yet there is a problem when you are using so many of these chemicals on your body as well as ingesting then in your food each day.

My first steps aside from eating higher quality foods and as many organic items as I can find is to replace my personal care items. A few days ago I purchased a natural deodorant and a natural toothpaste. I intend to research them further and bring you a review of each of them soon and let you know what is in them and if they work. So far the deodorant and the toothpaste work fine. Since I am the queen of trying to get a good deal I decided to go to Amazon and find some good subscribe and save deals for shampoo and conditioner,  facial cleanser, and a few other items. I ordered 5 products to try because it would save me an additional 15% off my order. When they arrive I will test them and let you know how well they work and what is in them.

Just a note for those of you trying to live a more healthy life just because something says organic does not make it healthy. You still have to watch what is in it and how many calories you are eating. If you eat a cinnamon roll  made with all organic ingredients it does not make it healthy. It may be a better choice than a non organic sweet treat but it is still bad for you.

Also don't trust labels something can have organic in the title and not actually be organic. I could make highly processed food full of all kinds of poor quality ingredients and call my company "Healthy Organic Food" as long as I didn't claim elsewhere on the packaging that I had organic products. Now if I were that deceitful people would quickly quit buying my products but there really are companies the capitalize on our ignorance so just be careful.

Last and most important if you decide to make the switch to less toxic items in your household as I am do your research and start small. Do your research and find out what is most important to your health and start there. I will start providing tips and options soon but if you take one personal care item each week or two a month and replace them with items that better for your health and skin you will be helping your body with each change.  

Finding my WHY

Finding my WHY?
I have been working in direct sales and watching the biggest looser and I found a common thread in them. I know it is hard to connect the dots but this is really something everyone needs to think about. Why is it that you want something? Do you have a clear why in your work and you fitness goals? If you don't have a clear concept of why you are doing something it makes it that much harder to get it done.

I have been searching for my in business and now in fitness and I have come to the conclusion that I have been frustrated because I have been confusing some concepts. I thought my "why" and my end goal were the same thing. For example I thought the amount of money I wanted to make was going to motivate me to sell more products. I thought fitting into the tiny dress I have been dying to wear again was my fitness why. None of this was truly the case once I started to examine things and listen to my emotions.

My business why's have all changed and they actually only have a little to do with money. My fitness has long been a passion for me and I am working hard to get there because I love myself when I am fit! That is an amazing reason to do this.

I am completing an exercise in a book right now by defining my why here on my blog so I can refer back to it. So here goes.....
I want to sell enough products with my side business to pay for the education and equipment I will need to become a personal trainer and group fitness instructor. That is pretty much the main reason for the side business and I am going to keep working at it but I am not going to alienate friends and family to make it happen or spend half my week busting my but for one party booking and being frustrated.

With that said I used to spend a good 30-50 hours a week participating in exhausting activities and shelling out more than half of what I earned to keep promoting my business and all it did for me was make me feel exhausted and frustrated. Not going to happen any more because for once I know what I ultimately want to do and I am going to focus on that.

Here is where I struggle I have so many why's for wanting to be fit and half of them are very selfish! Well that is what I used to think. I love to help others and I like to make others happy especially my hubby and I have been living a lot of my life for others. Well I am done with that but first I want to say the pressure to please others was something I put on myself. I just assumed that my hubby was thinking this or that. I thought he would think I was stupid for wanting to be in the fitness industry....but once I asked him I was completely wrong. How many years have I wasted like this. I didn't believe I could dance but after sticking to it for months and month I am getting better.

Fitness why's may sometimes feel silly and selfish but here we go

I want to look good in that dress, in a bikini (even if I never wear one) and yes I want to look good naked even if the only people who ever see me that way are my hubby and whatever doctor I may have to see.

I want to look in the mirror and feel like every day I have accomplished something by keeping my body in great shape.

I want to get strong so I can do every Pole Dance move known and then some

I want to continue to get fit so I can teach others how to get fit and help them on a path to a new life

I want to stay fit so I have confidence.. For this one I used to think being thin was the reason I felt confident  and yes that helps a lot but the real source of this confidence is that I put in the work and achieved a goal.

I want to feel good about myself all the time so I want to keep pushing to the next level and the next and never give up.

I want to feel good physically not just look good but feel good. I want to have the energy to make it through each day. I want to be healthy yes but that is too broad I mean it when I say I want to feel good.

Here is one that I am embarrassed to say but it is true and I think about it from time to time. I want my hubby to notice other people looking at him like he is a lucky man when we go out together. I want to be the girl that draws a little extra attention.

So those are a few of my fitness why's

Now I have to set some goals the first of which I have already started. Getting fit is a lofty goal so I have to break it down into smaller pieces. So here goes.....

Goal 1
I want to see my abs by June. I know I have them I can feel the muscle but I still have enough fat around the midsection that I can not see them. So the fat must go!

How am I going to do that? 
I am going to start with going back to calorie counting and see what I am eating and what I need to cut. I don't like to do this because I tend to get obsessive and spend a lot of time on it or refuse to go out with my hubby and relax but it needs to be done for at least a few weeks just to calculate the amount of calories I am eating and get on top of any new foods that I don't really know the calorie amount.

I am going to log my exercise and work to get an average of at least 2 hours a day in activity. Don't worry yourselves I am not talking about strenuous exercise for 2 hours every day. I am just talking about a good strenuous work out about 5-6 days a week for 45-90 minutes and some more leisure or fun but consistent activities such as walking the dog or going out dancing.

Next I am going to be more active in every day activities like when I am reading I can stand up, when I play a game on the tablet to pass a little time before I need to be somewhere I can pace. I can do my least favorite thing in the world and clean my house more often. I can practice dance moves while cleaning and while getting ready. I can do those figure 8's (hips move in the shape of an 8) while I am blow drying my hair.  I think you get the picture.

My worst enemy is the television these days I love my TV so one of my first financial goals is to save up for that treadmill I really want so I can watch television while working out even if it is just a light walk. I can spend several hours each day watching television because I have so many things I enjoy watching and it just sucks my time away. I watch it all on Hulu so it is not like I have to watch at a particular time but I always watch in the am while I wake up. When I get the treadmill I will get up and set the treadmill up and do my usual feed all the animals and myself and get on the treadmill for a light morning walk while I watch last nights episode of Nashville. If I feel up to I could make it a jog or a run as I wake up. My bet is this will make my wake up time shorter most days too. I just need to get myself on a budget and work towards buying this treadmill.

Here is the really important one I will chart my progress and evaluate my diet and exercise program every two weeks. If I am not getting the results I need to get where I want to be I will tweak it a little but I will be able to wear that dress and look great in it by June! I can't measure in pounds right now. While some more pounds may come off I am not going to frustrate myself I am down to 127 but I know to get to the size I want I may not loos too many more pounds overall because I will be gaining muscle as I loose the fat. I would be happy when it is all said and done to see 120 on the scale but I will be happy with any weight that has me looking lean and strong. I want people to look at me and know that I work out I don't just want to be skinny.

Healthy for Life My Story

It really has been a long time since I have updated any of my many blogs. I have been working hard to change my life and made many personal discoveries. I have had to face many obstacles and have come out with a new vision.

I started my weight loss journey again several years ago. I was down to a good healthy weight and had kept it off for quite some time give or take a few pounds. Then as a 31 year old I had an accident and broke my hip and I was hoping to get right back up and spend a lot of time walking the dog and on the treadmill and in roller skating and other activities I really enjoyed. Well that didn't happen walking on the pavement still hurts and skating is kind of scary because I can't find a great place to go with a clean enough area to skate in. The treadmill I can do now but at first it hurt like hell and it really upset me so I gave up.

I drown my fear and anxiety in food, and activities that kept my mind off of the obvious issues and my booty on the couch. I was really depressed and lost all confidence. One day I had had it and started back despite the physical limitations deciding a slow steady walk on the treadmill was better than sitting on the couch and I worked my way up to more intensity and got a gym membership and moved on to weights and cardio fitness. I dropped about 20 pounds. I am never sure what I weighed at my heaviest because I refused to weigh until about a month or so after that life changing day.

Then I got stuck and discouraged and I tried many things with my diet that I now believe were just silly. Not that shakes and supplements are all bad but I really don't think anyone needs them to be healthy. Then I decided that maybe the workout's I was doing were not helping that much anymore. I was still in the overweight category and I decided to look for something fun to do. Something that would leave me disappointed when I couldn't make it. I found pole dance fitness and I was finally motivated to go to class as it has both cardio and strength training in one and I have never once felt like the class was 70-90 minutes long. Okay maybe the first month I when I was worn out at about 45 minutes it seemed kind of long but once I built up the strength I was so motivated to just move to the next level. I lost another 25 pounds in less than 6 months!

I kept thinking to myself I want to do this for a living, but instead I signed up with another direct sales company to try to cut the expenses of going to every possible class I could at the dance studio. I still didn't believe that I could do something like teach health and fitness for a living. I have performed with the studio in front of live audiences and still didn't believe in myself. I started to gain a little of the weight back over the holidays and started feeling a little depressed again and even participating in some of the old eating for comfort behaviors I thought I had kicked. About 5 pounds later I was starting to feel it in my clothes and decided there was no way I was going back there again and I kicked it back in to high gear the last two weeks of February up to today. I am pleased to say the weight is gone already and I am feeling better again because I am eating well and exercising.

For the first time in my life I didn't let that failure overcome me and it pushed me to take a plunge into a new carreer. Last Monday I signed up to become an ACE personal trainer and I have plans to get at least at least one more of the ACE certifications and to learn to teach Pole and other forms of dance fitness.

I like the direct sales company I work for now but it is not my ultimate goal and I had to overcome some issues the last few weeks. I work with a food company and the main focus is really on the unhealthy items so I was feeling conflicted. I decided to put that aside and focus more on the healthy items and even healthier preparation of items that are though of as traditionally unhealthy.  I am feeling renewed in my business and in my life!

I thought I would share this story and also have a record for myself to see how far I have come. I am not sure about my exact weight I don't monitor it all the time right now because I have been at healthy weight for some time now and I tend to gain muscle and get frustrated by the scale sometimes. I measure more by the way my clothes fit and the size 4 jeans that were getting tight a little less than a month ago are starting to get a little loose and that is a great feeling!

I am going to prove that anyone who puts there mind to something can do it. One of my goals even with the metal in my leg is to get a flat split in at least one direction. With my injury I am proceeding slow and with caution but I am almost all the way down in a front split with my left leg in front and more than half with the right in front. I am sure I will be able to perfect the front split if I keep at it and don't push too hard. Then we will see about the straddle. One goal on working the injured leg at a time.

Then the other goal is to prove that anyone can get those nice looking abs if they just work hard enough. I know I can but I also know it will take a ton of work on my part and I need to kick up the cardio because when I work my abs I can feel the muscle under them. I want to loose the fat so I can also see that muscle.

If you made it this far I hope my story has inspired you from now on this blog will be about my healthy lifestyle and helping others adopt a healthy life. Feel free to ask me questions I am here to help!